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Yvonne Seale

The very concept of a $25m, 12 bedroom, 12.7k ft² house is of course grotesque, but I find myself begrudgingly respecting how clearly the owners don't care about things like "resale value" or "what the neighbours think" or "cohesion" or "taste."

Have a Guanyin-themed bedroom & a frog-themed bathroom but also a bunch of eclectic in rooms filled to the brim with Stuff!

I continue to think someone could write a dissertation on US McMansion Medievalism.

(... am I wrong in thinking the Viking longship table kind of slaps though?)

zillow.com/homedetails/1201-Ma?

Per the listing, this is "the Fire dining room decked with a dragon chandelier and fire sconces and lights, and a long dragon Italian carved table." The walls are painted red and orange, the ceiling is covered with a dragon-themed mural, and the floor is covered with floral-themed mosaic tiles.
ALT
According to the property listing, "the kitchen is dedicated to the Elements of Air and a story of its power is depicted on its ceiling." The vaguely baroque ceiling mural is paired with a bright blue country-style kitchen, and a dining table large enough to seat 20 that's carved to look like the prow of a Viking longship. I cannot begin to express how much the walls are plastered in random vaguely nautically themed things.
ALT
Who wouldn't want to sleep in a German-themed bedroom? Dream of dancing lederhosen-clad men beneath a duvet that appears to have a photo of a medieval street in Rothenburg ob der Tauber on it, with a headboard shaped like a castle behind you. Cosy. Also do these people have an RV lifestyle fetish of some kind? In this and basically every other room and hallway in this house, there are built in cupboards and cabinets everywhere: underneath beds and seating and lining walls. I appreciate smart storage but how many things can one family own?
ALT
Spot! That! Templar cross! Any visual respite which may have been offered by this room's cream walls is immediately negated by the fact that all the walls are covered with pseudo-medieval and/or religious carvings, and that the ceiling is painted with a purple mural of folded angels' wings. The furniture is all ornately carved, pseudo-late medieval and looks deeply uncomfortable to sit at or use.
ALT
Jan 25, 2025, 18:17 · · Web · 0 · 4
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